un coup de pied

This morning, like every morning, my iTunes Alarm went off at 7am, which means that "standard jazz" from ShoutCast's Storyville (internet "radio") station brought me to semi-consciousness. Like every morning, I stumbled around until I could find the Baby Plus (pronounced Baybay Plooce in our home), strap maman into the rig, and start prenatal Benjamin's prenatal "lesson" ... samples of which you can listen to here.

Not quite like every morning (but like several recent mornings), Nathalie reported Benjamin's kicking. Like every such morning, I place my hand on her belly to see if I can feel -- and then she repositions my hand to where she thinks my chances are best.

Unlike any other morning, this time I felt a kick!

I was half asleep, so the whole thing feels very dream-like.

I felt ... something ... a few times, but it could have been Nathalie's pulse in her belly, my own pulse in my hand, Nathalie's muscles tensing, wishful thinking, etc.

A couple times, she'd say, "Feel that?"

"No," I'd say. (Like so many other mornings.)

Then she said, "Feel that?!" And she seemed surprised when I said No.

Then I felt a definite something. And I said, "Was that one?"

Yes!

Very much like the first time I heard his heartbeat, it was brief and then hard to believe. Too brief to remember any details. The whole thing dances at the edge between perception and projection, like images in your peripheral vision which aren't there when you turn your head to see. Also like hearing his heartbeat, I now want more. I'm greedy for experiences of this boy. I've got images, sounds, and now feel. That's just smell and taste away from all 5 senses.

I can't wait to meet him.

- papa